CockaDoodle Doo (Rise n Shine)

I've been working on this for a few days, and finally finished it this morning.






The pattern is available here. I made a few changes: pattern calls for speed cro sheen (size 3 thread?.. size 5?) but I used sugar n cream (white) and peaches n creme (earth variegated, red, black). The pattern also calls for the comb and wattles to be made out of felt and to line the potholder with felt. I'm not going to line it, as I doubt it will be seriously used, and besides, most of my pot lids are insulated anyways. I also freehanded the cockscomb and wattle, and instead of beads for the eyes, I stitched them on with black.

I'm very happy with the results even though he turned out larger than the original because of the substitution of materials. Oh.. I also couldnt find my fiberfill to stuff the head with.. so I grabbed some white yarn that was lying around and used it instead.

Now, I wonder if I could improvise this into a Turkey potholder too. I probably could.. just make the neck on the head a little longer, but not sure how to do the tailfeathers.

Halloween Hilarity

A certain friend, who shall remain nameless (but he also blogs) sent me this picture in email today to celebrate the holiday. I don't usually like this kind of terminology, but this was so cute I had to share.

Boo Bees





Think about it.

Thoughts on a Thursday Morning

I hate it when blogger is so slow to load that I lose my train of thought. Yeah, I know I could use notepad and then cut n paste.. but I didn't want to do that... an extra step.

I was reading my "Eyes on the Prize" digest mail this morning, and one of the last entries was a memorial to a woman who had started the journey through the land of cancer in 2000, and ended in 2002. Two years. Maybe she was diagnosed alot further along than I was, but that still is a very short time.

If I only had a short time left.. what would I want to do? I want to see my kids graduate from college and be secure and on their own or in a stable, loving relationship. I'd love to see my grandchildren .. who would they look like? (if my kids are reading this.. PLEASE don't feel pressure to run out and get pregnant or impregnate someone... this is just my personal thoughts).

I'd love to travel. I want to see Ireland and Scotland. I've wanted to go there since I was little. I'd love to go to Salzburg, Austria and Dieppe, France.. where my ancestors who so believed in religious freedom.. left their ancestral homes to come pioneer in the new world. How hard that must have been! In the 1600's and 1700's.. there was no IM, no jets, no autos.. if they were literate at all.. it still would take months and months for letters to travel from Europe to the Americas (we weren't even the United States when my ancestors came).

What else would I like to accomplish? I'd love to get my yarn and supplies organized. When I was in a panic over having surgery, one of the things that I did to help me adjust was to write "farewell" letters to my husband and children. One of the things I wrote in my hubby's farewell letter was what to do with all my yarn!! LOL How silly that seems now, but I do have some yarn that could be sold to help with finances. Maybe I need to start working on that, with the huge hospital bills I have.

I am not happy with one of the after effects of surgery. I miss my sex drive. Now that we are cleared for everything.. I don't have the desire I used to have. My local gyn doctor isn't very sympathetic.. he just says I need to wait and see what happens. He doesn't want to give me hormones until cleared for them by my gyn/oncologist in Houston. And I understand that and agree.. since this cancer is estrogen driven, I do need to be away from any extra estrogen other than what is stored in my fat cells for awhile.

This is very early in recovery still, and maybe my libido will return. I want the closeness that intimacy brings, but I miss having the urge to do something about it!! And I know my husband does too. He's a quiet man, but when I asked him if he noticed a difference in me, he said yes and that he too missed it.

Maybe if I told the doctor my husband also misses my drive, then I'd get some empathy? Males tend to listen to males. Do I sound cynical? Probably, but I think it's actually realistic. If a man says his sex drive has gone on vacation, I think another male would consider it a serious situation.

I am thankful I haven't had to have internal rad.. cause after internal radiation, one of the things the docs tell you to do is to have lots of sex to avoid atrophy that the rads can cause. How do you have lots of sex when you have no desire?

I swear I will see the female gyn next time.. I think I communicate better with her. Oh, and I bought some Zoestra at the store the other day, and got home and the friggin' box was EMPTY!! Sheesh, I hate that. Now I have to find my receipt and go through the potential embarrassment of trying to convince the people at the service desk that I bought an empty box. Damn shoplifters.

Another WavyBaby Blanket

I used Caron Perfect Match in White, Hobby Lobby's I Love This Yarn in Soft Blue and TMA All Season in CloverPatch (the green). The picture doesn't show the detail of the green very well.. it has tiny flecks of yellow and blue in it.. very subdued.






The pattern calls for Baby Yarn and to start with a chain of 176; ending up with 175 stitches in the first row. I used worsted weight and chained about 132. I ended up having to undo some of my beginning chain. Eventually I had 118 stitches in a row and 6 "waves" per row in the blanket.

Now to go work on the "Impressive Plaid" blanket I started this weekend while hubby was glued to the tv watching football.

Going Green thanks to my BIL

After my surgery, my sister and brother in law came out to take care of me the second week of recovery.

Unlike me, my bil has to have something to do, so I found several small jobs around the house that my hubby and I just had not gotten to, or frankly, didn't know HOW to do.

Here's the results of one of the jobs.






I LOVE the smell of line dried clothes.. and sheets dried on the line are my favorite. They smell of sunshine and childhood. And now that I've reached the 6 week mark in my recovery, I can begin to use it.

Thanks again dear sis and bil for all you did for me. I won't soon forget your loving kindness.

"For whatsoever you have done to the least of these, ye have also done unto me".

Young at Heart Babyghan

Just finished another baby blanket. I'm trying to use up some of the hoards of yarn I have here (it's beyond a stash.. it's taking over my life!!)

This one was made with Caron SS brights. Pattern name is "Young At Heart" and is a pattern that is no longer available, originally designed for Caron's Dazzleaire yarn. Both pics clickable to see larger.

EDIT: I had the name of the pattern WRONG. It's really called "Young Hearts" and the pattern is found here.







Now off to make something else.

I have a little more than 12 oz of a yarn that Hobby Lobby used to carry called "All Seasons Yarn" by TMA. The color name is called Cloverpatch. It's a pale bright green with tiny tiny flecks of yellow. I mean the yellow is so vague you have to really look hard to see it. The color reminds me of Caron's Limelight.. but exetremely faded. I'm wondering if I put it and some white and the Caron Limelight together if it would make a decent ripple or wavy ghan. Just a thought.

Recent finished Projects & Some Ramblings

Supposed to be a baby blanket, turned out to be twin sized ..
when they say to use baby yarn, they MEAN it.. lol.

I used RedHeartKids in White and Camper (the variegated..think it's discontinued)
and Caron's Perfect Match in MidnightNavy.

I will probably donate it to Project Linus as this was a whim and stash buster.
I had finished a project September 8th while in a hotel room and was at a loss on what to do next. I found the pattern online, remembered I had this variegated that I had bought without having any plans for it.. the price was so good I couldn't pass it up.

Fortunately, I had never carried it in the house from my van. Sometimes being lazy pays off.

I thought had enough (4 skeins of each of the red heart and 2 skeins of the Caron)..
and I almost did, only had to order a skein of the PerfectMatch.

Pattern is here.




I keep calling this pattern "Lacey Cables" but that is wrong,
Coats&Clark calls it Crochet Cables Afghan.

It's supposed to be an adult size afghan, but I made it as a baby 'ghan, by doing fewer squares.

For the blue one I used HobbyLobby's "I Love This Yarn" in soft blue.

It's for one of the ladies who works for my husband.. she just had a grandson.




And here it is in RedHeart SoftWhite. Pattern is here.




This is not a free pattern, it's one I had finished long ago and could never decide who to give it to.

The yarn is some super soft baby stuff I bought from SmileysYarns.com (not cheap as you have to order 40.00 worth at a time) and the pattern is one designed by Terry Kimbrough.

I can't remember the pattern name.

I now know who this is meant for.. it will be mailed this week to my new great niece in Florida. Just perfect for them as they don't really need a heavy blanket in that climate.

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I still need to post the other half of the report on my surgery, but just haven't had the desire to do so.

I will report that I am one month out, and still can't believe I let this happen. I feel mutilated, empty, hollow. I KNOW this is not logical, but it is the way I feel.

I needed the surgery. I was very very lucky in that the cancer was so early that I will probably not need any more treatment other than fairly frequent followups for a few years. I read stories about other women who need radiation and/or chemotherapy and am so grateful that I don't have to go that route (at least not yet).. but still.. there is this overwhelming sense of loss.

I mean.. how to reconcile that from a very early age we are defined as different and special because we have the ability to give birth.. and then to have those organs surgically torn out of our bodies? I know menopause was on it's way and I wouldn't be able to create life after that anyways.. but then again, you read about women having babies in their 60's thanks to fertility treatments.

Part of my troubles with acceptance is that the cancer took the choice out of my hands.. well, not completely.. I could've chosen to not have the surgery and gotten much sicker.. but is that really a choice?

Very few people want to listen to me ramble my way through my self-therapy. Any wonder I spend so much time on Hyster-sisters & EyesOnThePrize ?

DaVinci Report, Part 1

I went into the hospital feeling healthy. Did not want this surgery. I know it's necessary, but I do not want it. Have not had time to get counseling that I sorely need. Offered to let my husband have it for me. Couldn't even get on the elevators at first.. had to let one group go ahead of us.

I was mad sitting in the waiting area. The hospital wanted $$ from us before the surgery. They called me into the financial office, only one chair. Hubby had check book.. I told them you don't need me. Went back to the waiting area and sat and crocheted. It was 10am, TV had a food show on and I had been NPO since midnight. MEAN!!!

I sat there and glared and crocheted.

Almost as soon as hubby came out of the financial office they paged me back to preop. Got undressed.. was given a bag to put my clothes in and a hospital gown and the stupid slipper socks to put on.

They started doing vitals, took my rings, watch, glasses, necklace gave them to hubby. I called the chaplain whose name had been given to me on the preop visit. She said she thought I was supposed to come in at noon.. I said no.. my surgery is at noon. She said I'll be right there!

She did manage to get there and we had a brief visit and prayer. I cried. The nurse came back and hubby said I was having anxiety. I said... not anxiety.. I'm grieving the loss of the woman I am now. The nurse went to get some medication.. she charted that she gave me Zofran and Versed. I think she only gave me Zofran, because I never got calm.

They moved me to the holding area and the anesthesiologist came to visit me. He asked if I would open my mouth, say ah and tilt my head back. I did, he said good. I asked about the epidural. He was surprised.. said they usually didn't do epidurals for DaVinci's. Now I'm beginning to wonder if I chose the wrong hospital... there's beginning to be so many little errors.

He said he would talk to my doctor. Ok, fine. I'm still crying. They ask if I got any versed. My husband tells whoever is asking that 2cc's of something was put into my IV, but we didn't see the vial.

My doctor comes over and sees me and asks if I have any more questions. I ask if she uses vaginal packing after surgery. She says no. I'm glad, one less thing to worry about. I give her my list of positive statements that I want said to me during surgery from Peggy Huddleston's "Prepare for Surgery, Heal Faster" book.

Several people ask me to say my name and spell it. They want my birthdate. I started to ask if they wanted my drivers liscense or SS# too. They also wanted me to tell them what surgery was planned.

When I could tell them "DaVinci Assisted Total Laprascopic Hysterectomy with Bilateral Salpingo Oopherectomy and possible surgical staging".. they were all amazed. It amused them so much that I had to perform this feat for at least 3 other people. "you must be medical people" Yes and No. I believe in being well informed and taking as much responsibility as possible for my own health.

I have to say goodbye to my husband and they take me to surgery. Still awake, still crying. I boohoo all the way into the surgical suite.

The doctor and her assistant are looking at me with real concern in their faces.

They ask me if I got any Versed. I again tell them something was put in my IV, but don't know what. They're calling preop to check with the nurse, because versed and zofran were charted, but I'm still really sad. Just sobbing.

The anesthesiologist starts putting in the epidural, has to try 3 times. I feel something drip down my back during one of the tries and ask what I'm feeling.. no one will tell me. He apologizes for taking 3 tries.. I tell him the first time I ever had an epi it took 5 tries and that was 20 years and many pounds ago.. so 3 is not at all bad in my book. He said that made him feel a little better.

They then have me move onto the operating table. I'm thinking I wish I was asleep before all this happened. I'm so scared and I don't want this necessary surgery. Still crying.

I guess they finally decide to give me something for agitation, because I'm much too alert for their liking. asking too many questions that they don't want to answer. It burns for a minute and then it stops. Shortly after that, he says something like, say goodnight. and gives me something in my IV and the next thing I know I'm vaguely hearing someone say "no, let's leave it in for pain control".

I'm in the PACU. Post Anesthesia Care Unit. What we used to call the Recovery Room.

A little later, I'm in severe pain.. but not in my abdomen. My arm is killing me.. it feels like it did when I broke my humerus about 8 years ago.

I'm yelling.. "Help Me. I'm being ignored !!" One of the nurses came over and sharply told me you're not being ignored, there are other patients here.

I told her I was hurting very badly in my arm & shoulder. I heard her say to someone else.. gas pains. (In lap surgeries they pump your abd full of CO2.. and the gas can make you hurt in weird places.. shoulders are one of them). I told her no.. it wasn't gas, it was an old fracture .. and it hurt again. I had forgotten to warn anyone preoperatively that I have reduced range of motion in my right arm because I have adapted to it in my everyday life. I never think about the right arm being more fragile than the left.

They finally let my husband come in and he confirmed that I had had an avulsion fracture of my right humerus a while back. He rubbed it and made it feel a lot better. We talked a little bit. He told me something about the pathology report, but I'm still too groggy to take it all in. I got my wedding rings back. He had to leave because they only let family stay a little while in recovery.

I had a lot of discomfort from my shoulder, but no pain meds ordered for it. I just had to tough it out. We had asked for a private room, none were available. We waited and waited and waited. It seemed like there wasn't going to be a room available until morning and I would spend the night in the PACU. I asked to see my husband again.

They let him come in and we talked about whether to wait on a Private and let him go on back to the hotel or take a semi private and risk the fact that he wouldn't be able to stay with me the whole time.

We decided to wait on the private, and I sent him on back to the hotel so he could get some sleep since I would be in the PACU until morning (he had had a really bad day the day before surgery, so he was dragging).

Of course, about an hour after he left, a room became available. I got into my room about 1am.

~~I'll post more later. This makes me sad just to type it. ~~

Please stay tuned

I had surgery. It was successful. I am probably cured of endometrial cancer by this surgery.

I am also very tired and need to conserve my energy.

I will post all about the surgery et al when I am feeling better.

Unending thanks and gratitude to all the thoughts and prayers that were lifted up in my name. I could not have gotten this far without your help....my friends.

Ignorance as a route to happiness?

Sometimes it just doesn't pay to be diligent.

And sometimes you really really wish you had left well enough alone.

Sometimes, ignorance IS bliss.

I wish I was still ignorant.

This weekend I realized I had not seen a report of the evaluation of my biopsies by the laboratory in Dallas, that was done July 11th. So I called them today.

The pathologists there think they already see cancer.

Endometrial Adenocarcinoma, Endometroid type.
FIGO Grade I associated with complex atypical hyperplasia.

However, the ca that they saw is very small.. 2mm (less than 1/8th an inch). However, I'm still in shock. Went shopping for stuff for family then came home and cried.

I have the path report right in front of me and keep going over and over and over it.

Staging can't be done until surgery. We'll know more then.

I had this report faxed to my surgeon in Houston.

Willowy Peach Afghan

I'm working on an afghan made up mainly out of my own head...but the square pattern is from Jan Eaton's 200 squares book. It's the "Willow" Square. (that reminds me.. I haven't seen the Movie Willow in awhile.. might be time to dig it out again. Dang.. I just had a huge brain freeze on the actor in that movie.. the same one who played Jim Morrison in the Doors... sheesh)

Back to the afghan.

Colors are all by Caron Simply Soft.. Country Peach, Copper Kettle, Chocolate, OffWhite and (perhaps) Berry Blue.

Here's some pics of what I have so far.... still haven't figured out the perfect layout. And I go back and forth between liking the Peach & Copper or the Peach & Chocolate squares the best.

(please excuse the messy bed.. and the ends not woven in yet.. since I might be taking some of these back apart.. I didn't want to do that yet.)





The square in different color combos (one of them has a country blue instead of berry blue)




some other squares in the same colors...




Almost all the squares so far

Any opinions on what I should do? I'm waning to emphasize the peach color. DD says she likes the Peach & copper best.. and that I could mainly do it and scatter randomly (very randomly) the others.. then do the peach and chocolate as a border around the outside.

I dunno...I don't have enough made yet to lay that out and see.

I'm making this for myself.. as a cuddly for in the hospital (if I finish it in time) and afterwards. Peach is the color for endometrial cancer. They're still not sure if I have cancer or not.. but I'm trying to get myself mentally psyched.. just in case.

Houston Revisited

I am currently in Houston, staying at a Hampton Inn. Tomorrow I see a Gyn/Oncologist who is supposed to be qualified to do the DaVinci Robotic Surgery.

Since I have to have a hysterectomy, this is the way I want to go. I hope she approves me.

Houston has changed ALOT since I was last here. The hotel we're in was once an empty field. Amazing.

When do I get to grieve?

Well, I've finally come to the acceptance part of the five stages of grieving...I never thought I would get here.

I was stuck in Denial for quite a while, then Anger came along at having to have all of my female organs removed, I think Bargaining came in with wanting treatment with Megace and weight loss. Depression I am still moving through and have begun to accept that I will have to have surgery after all.

What I want to know is when do I get to be sad for myself? when will someone just hold me and let me cry? When will someone acknowledge that yes, it will be sad to no longer have uterine orgasms? I want someone to be sad for me.. and to QUIT TELLING ME IT WILL BE OK!!! Dammit.. it's not OK and never will be again!!!

I know I have to get this precancerous stuff out of me. Fine, I can do that. But please let me grieve.. hold me and let me cry without trying to make me feel better. Cry with me, it's ok.. I won't break just because I'm crying... but I need to cry and no one wants to let me.

Weekend Journal

Saturday I got up at 1:30 am.. started my walking routine. Still very depressed over needing this surgery.. so cried some more and went to a hysterectomy support site (they're neutral.. supportive of whatever a woman and her doctor decide is the best treatment) to bitch & moan some.

Got my CottonSwap at C'ville's box put together. I finally realized with a surgery date of July 23, I'd better get it in gear. So it's all ready to mail on Monday. I forgot to put a note in the box, but I guess I can write and mail a card seperately. Good thing I buy things on sale on impulse... I was able to put a really nice box together for her. It's already taped up or I'd make pics. (maybe I'll untape the bottom and make pics anyway.. we'll see.)

Got another walk in at 6am. Almost not raining. (we've had ALOT of rain here lately.. I keep expecting to see a man and his family out gathering gopher wood.. if I do.. I'm going to beg a ride.) Got back, cleaned out the front passenger side of the van for hubby and dug around in my yarn storeage and found a skein of yarn for a HIJ/RAOK gift.

Grabbed son's suitcase out of the back of my van to take in the house to pack for me. my suitcase has developed a sticky zipper, so I'm borrowing his.

Packed suitcase for overnight trip to Shreveport. Ate late breakfast.. Hubby came home and he started his packing for a week away from home.

10am..went on 3rd walk of the day. Hubby came with and I was able to complete the walk just a little faster than usual.. even with slowing down to catch breath a few times.

We finally left for Shreveport around 2pm. Stopped by the ProjectLinus coordinators home and dropped off two blankets and an unfinished quilt (son had started project at christmas and then with all the activities of senior year never got back to it. I was going to finish it.. but with impending surgery, I've decided there's no way.. Hopefully they can do something with it.).

Got to Shreveport, checked in. Went to Lounge and had free beers (well.. one & 1/2.. we each had 1 free and bought 1 more to share). Plus a few fried chicken wings to absorb the alcohol.

Then we went to Ralph & Kacoo's for dinner. Yum Yum. We both had she-crab soup and hubby had planked salmon and I had grilled shrimp and we both had steamed veggies. Hubby kept on drinking (martinis).. but I settled back to Iced Tea.. someone has to be a responsible driver.

I couldn't hardly eat any of mine, so we got a to go box. Went back to hotel and I fell asleep about 7:30. Woke up at midnight showered and went back to sleep until 3. Got up and got hubby to airport at 4am for check in. His flight left at 6..

Waited until he went through security at 5:30.. they even made him take off his belt.. lol I went back to hotel.. had breakfast (grits, eggs, sausage, biscuit, waffles.. omg.. I made up for not eating the night before).. then back to room for a short rest.

8am I got back on the road and was home 90 minutes later.

Hubby called me when he got to ATL and GVille and when he checked into hotel. (I'm not usually so insecure.. but with all I'm going through lately.. I'm very clingy right now)

When I got home, I took some very old Lorazepam I had.. and passed out in the recliner. I accidentally spent the night there .. never got moved into bed. I did wake up long enough in the evening to fix the leftover shrimp for my supper.. and bang I was out again.

I'm about to go start my Monday walk.. missed walking much Sunday.. weather was thundering when I was considering it around noon. I did park the car and do some walking around the hotel (this is an oldfashioned hotel.. everything is spread out and NO elevators).. so I hope that counted a little...

Sorry for the book.. but just what I did with my weekend. I still have to drag in my suitcase and unpack & repack. Gonna take a change of clothes with me when I go to Dallas in case the Oncologist suggests some tests that could be done the next day or I'm too tired to make it home that night.

Then next saturday I have to go to Shreveport to pick hubby up. Then Wed. the 18th.. we go through the early flight thing again...but I told him I might beg off from that one.. depends on how much cleaning I get done this week while he's gone. I LOVE him immensely.. but it's easier to get stuff done when he's not here. I have more room to pile stuff on the bed and don't have to continuously clean it off so he can sleep.

Ok ok.. Gonna Post this and go take my 2nd walk for Monday.

P.S. This has become my daily prayer.. and my signature line where I can add it (one place I post doesn't allow religious references.. so I took the reference to God out. If they still kick about it, I'll leave that group.. there's being tolerant and then there's being ridiculous.).
--
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Reinhold Niebuhr

June 2007 Dishcloths

Most are from "A Dozen Double quick Dishcloths"










The Flower shaped one is from a book of squares & motifs.

Questions answered and more arise in their place

Went back to the doctor yesterday with my questions that had arisen over the weekend. 3 pages of them.

My doctor looked at them and started commenting about how smart I was to do this, I told her no.. it was my mild OCD kicking in and trying to regain a little control over the rollercoaster that has become my life recently. I was actually supposed to see both doctors, mine and her partner, (partner will be leading the surgery) but they thought partner had already left for the day. After I had finished talking to her, we found him and I got to talk to him also. Some of the answers were different, but not markedly so.

I got a lot accomplished. I got hormone levels done (4 sticks.. I'm a hard draw. Not complaining, just a fact) and I should get those results on Thursday. Hopefully this will show how far I am into menopause.

We discussed the possibility of keeping my cervix.. but that won't happen. sigh. Too much chance of cancer having invaded there.

I did get a script for Xanax. This has been very helpful. I took one after we got home and it relaxed me so much I was able to sleep for 2 hours straight. I will cut them in half from now on though... and be very judicious in taking them. I don't want to be zombied or too numb to work through the grieving process. But there are times that the crying just goes on and on and on..that would be the time to use the med. (this is when it was good that I had seen my doc first.. *male* partner said he wouldn't have given me anything.. ha.. he doesn't have to live with this overly emotional woman)

I also got a consult with a Gyn/Oncologist in Dallas at the Baylor University Sammons Cancer Center on July 11th at 1:30pm. Already discussions have begun about how to treat after surgery should it really be cancer. I'm afraid I will end up with an abdominal incision. More pain, longer recovery.

Now I need to find out what stores (a yarn store?? a LYS??) might be nearby. I plan to arrive early, Dallas traffic can be bad. Maybe stay the night. Unfortunately DH will be out of town and won't be able to go with me. sigh.

On the down side, I found out I will have to do a bowel prep *yuck* and I forgot to ask about donating my own blood, whether I will have a urinary catheter in place, TEDS hose, IV Pain med pump and if drawing blood for a cancer marker would be worthwhile.

Oh well, I can always go back on Thursday or Friday. They are going to get tired of seeing me.

Now for something completely different

I got these from the Holiday in July RAOK list on Crochetville.





The sunshine elf from Arizona sent me the above bamboo yarn. It is sooooooooo soft and huggable. I love it. and in one of my favorite colors too. Now I have to find the perfect pattern for it. I'm thinking maybe a scarf?






And the above beauties came from an elf in Brooklyn New York. They arrived the same day that we got my biopsy results. Such perfect timing has to be in God's hands.

I have discovered that I love crocheting with cotton. Oh dear.. do I feel another addiction building? probably.

Look at what my OCD has led me to buy now:





These I ordered from the Knitting-Warehouse (yeah I know.. the K word, but they have awesome shipping rates).






And these came from Elmore-Pisgah. Can you believe that those cones (1 lb of lovely cotton each) only cost 5.99!! They're a special run and when they're gone, they're gone.

The blue/tan variegated is called Mountain Sky. I love it.

The other variegated is called Passion. Just yummy.

The only problem is that I can't use the stuff fast enough .. LOL.

Now I only have to decide what to take with me to work on in the hospital (in case of abdominal surgery instead of the lap).

Decision made

Can't I just crochet my way out of this? Give me my hooks and some giant balls of yarn (pounders.. lots of them) and let me crochet myself a cocoon .. let me sleep away all this drama, emotionalism and HARD decisions.

The biopsy came back. It wasn't positive for cancer, but the news isn't perfect either like it has been in the past.

I have "complex endometrial hyperplasia with moderate atypia and squamous metaplasia". Basically what that means is that I have a 30% chance of the atypia turning into cancer. My uterus needs to come out. And everything I've found says that Atypia is a precursor to endometrial cancer.

I have no problem with them taking my uterus out. It's the fact that they also want to take my cervix and ovaries. I have had very little symptoms of menopause... and I'm very worried about being thrown into menopause with no help.

Also my cervix has never been a problem, every pap I've ever had has been negative. New studies suggest that the cervix is important for maintaining support of the pelvic floor (delaying or preventing prolapse) and may also play a role in sexual satisfaction.

I'm emotional and obsessive thoughts have taken over my brain. I can feel them, but I can't control them.

And I'm terrified. My doctor offered to send me to an Oncologist for a second opinion. An oncologist. Everytime I think about that I want to cry. I just want to wrap myself in a blanket and hide.

I go back to my docs on July 2 to ask my ton of questions. Surgery is scheduled for July 23.

To surgery or not to surgery

This is a very much non-crochet post.

I am going to post about my recent health difficulties regarding my menstrual cycle, so if this type of information bothers you, or it's not what you want to read right now, you may want to move along to another blog. Please come back later, I don't plan to focus on this exclusively. And while being sick this past week, have made lots of dishcloths and will have pictures up shortly.

Now, back to the health issues.

I've been dealing with irregular menstrual periods for several years now. It started maybe 5 or 10 years ago? I really don't remember how long ago, it's been a while. At first I'd just miss a period ...and I'd get all excited thinking that God had blessed me with another baby (even though my husband has had a vasectomy. Sometimes those don't work...I personally know a couple who have had a post vasectomy baby).

After wasting money on pregnancy tests a few times, I finally went to the GYN and she told me it was probably due to my being overweight, that fat tissue stores estrogen and since I have an abundance of fat tissue, I have more than enough estrogen for me. Joy.

At that time, I don't remember that we started any treatment, my periods were just irregular, and not unusual for me (my normal cycles are fairly heavy, lasting about a week).

A few years later, I am continuing the missing periods pattern, up to missing 3 or 4 months in a row and then when I do have one, it's a monster. Not painful, just heavy flow and clots. Unfortunately, the doc I had been going too moved away, so I had to find a new one.

I did find one, and she was ok at first. Put me on provera 10mg/day/ for 1st 10 days of the month. This was to fool my body into making me have a regular monthly period. This worked, but like the idiot I sometimes am, I didn't continue to take the medicine. I'm just not a good patient sometimes.

Things rock on, I get to the point where I'm 6 months between periods, but now I'm spotting almost all the time and when I do bleed.. whoa Nelly. My doc decides I need an endometrial biopsy. I agree.. not knowing what I'm in for.

OMG talk about pain!! I was completely unprepared for how much that hurt. And of course it came back negative (which I could've told her in the first place.. but she was being a good doc. and doing what she's supposed to do.. making sure I don't have cancer).

I keep going to this doc for a couple or 3 more years, still having spotting between periods. She knows this (or is supposed to) and yet she prescribes antibiotics once for a bladder infection that I don't have. Turns out they think I have a UTI because of blood in my urine. I'm spotting DUH!! of course blood is going to show up in my urine!! That ticks me off a little, but I let it go.

Second thing that makes me unhappy with this doc is that a year later she wants to do another endometrial biopsy. I ask for pain meds before hand.. they don't have anything to offer. I have some vicodin in my purse from a dental procedure. I ask if I can take that. The nurse checks with the doc and comes back and says unless I have someone to drive me home, that no. I can't take it. I don't have anyone to drive me. Phooey. The nurse gives me my med back and I take it anyway. I KNOW how the vicodin affects me and it's not too strong for me to drive while taking it.

The difference is amazing. This time the biopsy doesn't hurt. I drive home just fine. And again the biopsy is negative.

What really tore it for me with this doctor is something she didn't do. Along with endometrial biopsies, she's been having me get pelvic & transvaginal ultrasounds. I get them done in the town I live in because the cost isn't too bad. My doc is in another town an hours drive away. Well, she asks me to get them done in her town.. her reasoning being is that she knows the technique they use and is more comfortable with their radiologists interpretations. I think, ok, that's reasonable and agree to get the U/S done there.

Until I go to schedule and find out what their fees are. OMG, no way. You see, our insurance on me has a very high deductible so I end up paying most things out of my own pocket. Fortunately, except for this ongoing menstrual problem, I'm generally very healthy.

I'm not going to pay this other clinic this huge fee for the U/S when I can get it done much cheaper in my town. So, I get it done where I want to do it and go back for the follow up appointment. Doc says NOTHING to me about my not following her directives. This makes me think she's lying and I decide not to go back to her.

Fast forward 2 years. I'm still having monster periods and the spotting in between is nearly continuous. I decide it's time to start getting things done and besides our community has a new female GYN. I won't have to drive an hour to see the doc. This is good. (we've had a male GYN for a while, but I don't like going to male GYN's.. I generally find them to be MCP's and unempathetic. I said generally. I know there must be good ones out there, I just haven't run across them.)

So, went to see her June 5. Had regular checkup.. including pap. She also scheduled me for mammo and U/S. Mammo because it was time for another and U/S to check the bleeding problem. I know I have fibroids and maybe they had gotten really enlarged to cause the continuous problem. The doc and I discuss me trying the provera again.

Mammo & U/S were scheduled for June 20. In the meantime the docs office calls around the 10th or so and says they need to repeat the pap.. they couldn't get enough cells because of the bleeding. I'm no longer spotting now.. I'm having a real period.. inspite of taking the provera. I tell the docs office this and they schedule me to come in on the 21st.. thinking that my test results will be in and I'll probably be through bleeding. I could tell them that I won't be finished.. I hardly ever finish.. just slow down, but it will still be a good time to talk to the doc about the test results.

Come June 12th.. I start bleeding super heavily. I'm soaking a super plus tampon every few hours, and wearing a pad. I get up one morning and the tampon I put in the night before falls out of me into the toilet along with huge clots. Grosssssssssss. I've never had that happen before. Thank goodness for those toilet wand things where you change the scrubber out between uses. That worked to grab the tampon out so it didn't go into the septic system. Sheesh.. hubby would've been furious about that.

I'm thinking that this will only be a day or so of super heavy bleeding.. I've done that before. And besides, I have to take my son to orientation at his college in a couple of days.

Orientation doesn't go the smoothest, but I get through it. I posted about it a few days ago. I think I got overtired at orientation because since I got back home, my cycle continued on, very heavy.. having to change every 2 hours (which really disrupts your sleep pattern, let me tell you) and now I'm also HURTING. My abdomen is cramping, and my back and my hips ache. What is this? I haven't had dysmenorrhea in ages. I mean, it's bad enough that ibuprofen isn't touching it, vicodin isn't helping. Skelaxin WITH motrin helps some.. what works best is vodka martinis. But I don't like to drink during the day.. and don't really think alcohol is the remedy.. but it gets me through till I can see the doc.

With all this bleeding and now pain, if someone would have offered me a hysterectomy at that point.. I'd have said.. when and where. I'll be there.

Finally by June 20, my bleeding is beginning to slow a little. I can occassionally go 3 hours between changing. I get mammo done.. there's a spot, but it clears on compression. Technologist wants me to come back in 6 months, but the radiologist says 1 year. Maybe I'll split the difference and do 9 months?

U/S also goes well. I do still have fibroids but they're very small. Unlikely to be the cause of the excessive bleeding. My endometrial lining is very thick though. Ovaries are small (normal for my age).

so, yesterday I go to the Doc, still bleeding. I tell the nurse and tell her I'd like to talk to the Doctor even if we can't redo the pap. The Doc comes in and says that the tests were good, nothing bad showed up and that in the light of my heavy bleeding she'd like to do an endometrial biopsy.

Lovely.

I ask if she can give me pain medication before hand. She says all they have is 800 mg of Motrin (Ibuprofen). I reluctantly agree (wishing I had brought my vicodin from home). Even with the motrin onboard, I'm scared. Upset, crying, nauseous and almost fainting at one point.

I get through it.. it's not too bad. Uncomfy, and the speculum kept coming out of me (never had that happen before) and then one time there was a quick sharp pain, as if someone had pinched me on my inner thigh.. but that was it. Not bad at all, thank goodness. One thing that helped is that I was already dilated a little from bleeding. Before, with the second Doc, she always had to dilate my cervix a little to get inside to take the biopsy. I think she also took a biopsy from the vaginal wall. I do know I'm not allowed to wear tampons for a week. ewwww.. I hate using pads.

Good and bad points about the biopsy:

Good in that IT IS OVER WITH until next time.

Bad in that I have to wait another week to get the results.

Good in that she's willing to do a hysterectomy on me

Bad in that my anatomy is such that a vaginal approach won't work.. she'll have to go through the abdominal wall.

They don't do endometrial ablation in that office (a burning away of the endometrium.. sometimes cures heavy bleeding.. sometimes doesn't), so my choices to cure the bleeding are either birth control pills or a hysterectomy.

I'm still thinking, and will have to see what the biopsy shows.. but.. if there's no cancer.. I'm considering giving the BC a try... at least until the first of the year.

Then if BC isn't working, in Jan or Feb have the surgery.. so my deductible would be met for the year.. and I'd have a whole year to get other work I need done accomplished.

I think I'm going to ask my hubby if he can come with me to the Doc next week.

New WM Uni's

Does anyone else think that the "new" walmart uniforms (navy polo's and khaki pants) look like the "standardized dress" that many schools now require?

I don't know whether to hate the new wm look (MUCH harder to find someone to help you) or to laugh at it and be thankful because it will give those of us who are fighting school uniforms just one more piece of ammunition.

Standardized Dress? You mean you want to program my child to work at WM?? Get REAL!!!!

It's scary though.. I found a website where WM serfs were posting about the new requirements.. and here's part of what one of them posted:

" I have been wearing this uniform for almost 3 years. ... You don't have to wonder what your going to wear, the expense is cheaper ... , and it doesn't make me feel inferior or superior to the management team. You can wear any kind of shirt that is within the colors as long as they don't have any writing or emblems that are not WalMart (they can be plain shirts).
...."

Sounds EXACTLY like some of the pro-uni arguments I've read. Someone (the walmart worker and the people in charge who instigated the new uni) bought the propaganda. :(

Orientation Blues

Well, the orientation visit to my sons university went well. For the most part.

He will be attending Northwestern State University of Louisiana in Natchitoches, LA (Natchitoches is pronounced Nack a dish or Nack a tish). NSU is a great small university (houses the Scholars College of Louisiana and has a very strong math & science department) and I love the town of Natchitoches too. The movie Steel Magnolias was filmed in this town.

We arrived Friday early enough to have a very nice dinner at The Landing and then made a trip out to the local WalMart to buy some things we had neglected to bring with us.

I had a hard time going to sleep Friday night.. finally dropped off about 1am and woke up at 4:24 AM.. and couldn't go back to sleep. Argh.

Got to the school in time to get a great parking place, got registered, turned in his Selective Service ( I kept wanting to call it Secret Service..lol) and vaccination info. Found that the Transcript that the HS gave us wasn't official (envelope wasn't sealed). I had questioned the person in the HS office about that, but they assured me it was fine. Sheesh.... That will teach me to deal with someone less than the secretary. But not a huge deal, they let him go on and register.

We then got to wander around and visit with other students and parents for 90 minutes until they were ready for us to go into an auditorium. There was a nice presentation, really cute routines and then they took the students off in groups to talk to them about the university.

Parents got to stay there and listen to other talk and we got to ask lots of questions.

Then they sent us all to lunch at the main dining hall. The leader of the orientation said it was only about a 1/2 mile away, but did advise us to drive because of the rain forcast.

Guess what? I didn't want to lose my great parking space so I walked. BAD decision. I didn't even get my unbrella out of the van. another BAD decision.

I saw my son at lunch.. he was doing the "if I ignore her, maybe she won't see me and come talk to me routine". Too funny. I sat a few tables away and alone.. and his new friends guilted him into coming to talk to me.

After lunch, I started walking back to the auditorium (by the way.. NEVER believe a skinny person when they say a walk is only 1/2 mile.. that was at least a mile walk if not further) and the bottom fell out of the sky. I walked halfway back and all kinds of cars passed me by.... I didn't expect any help as I didn't know anyone there, but it was discouraging. I got about 1/2 way back and was as wet as if I had stepped out of the shower when a car with NSU emblem on it stopped and gave me a ride. It was almost useless at that point, but I took it anyway.

I spent the rest of the afternoon freezing in the auditorium. I did try to go to the ladies room and dry off with some paper towels, but they were out of towels. No one had thought to make coffee for us freezing people either.

One lady came in the restroom and stripped down to her underwear and wrung her stuff out before she put it back on. I didn't bother.. no use.

They never told us where to find out kids again. I was so frustrated with the university by this point that I would've left if I had been able to find my son. I looked at the schedule for the kids and went to the building they were supposed to end up at. I was so tired.. and there was NO ELEVATOR from the ground floor to the 1st floor. arrrrggghhh.. I thought the Disabilities Act made elevators required?? so I climbed stairs, exhausted. Still couldn't find kid. Sat and waited and called hubby and griped and waited and son FINALLY showed up.. he dumped all his papers on me.. and he went to get his ID made.

We were finally finished at 4:30pm. Starving. Decided I was too wiped out to drive 2 hours back to camp (where son is working) then another hour home. Besides, road to camp is red clay road and with the downpour of rain.. that road scares me. Tried to get room at HI.. all they had was smoking.. so went back to Hampton. Sweet talked girl at Front desk into AARP rate even though I couldn't find my card. Went to dinner.. slept.

When I drove son back to camp yesterday, I was right about the red clay road. It was almost washed out at one point.. to where there were two water filled holes at the bottom of a hill.. and the holes were catty-corned to each other and couldn't avoid either of them (right hand side of the road had a sheer drop off and the left side, trees were down). I could fell my van sliding as I went through them at 5mph.

On top of all this, I have had bad menstrual bleeding since Tuesday.. and it's not getting better.. (yes I am seeing a doc about this). Just difficult dealing with HAVING to visit a bathroom at least every 2 hours if not more often. And pain.

I am tired and I think I am going to go order myself some cotton from elmore-pisgah as a reward for all this.

Son is signed up for 18 hours (including 5 hours of band) and wants to join a band fraternity. We still have lots of things to do, like setting him up a local bank account in that town, buying his meal plan, reserving books, finding SOMEWHERE to get a menningitis vac.(I've been battling with our doc's office for at least a month over getting one... this is a whole another blog post..later).. but at least he's now an official student.

I don't know whether to be happy for him or sad for me. A little of both I suppose.

A bedroom WIP

( WIP stands for Work In Progress for those who aren't familiar with the crochet lingo.)





Old border coming down













Some of the Junk from the bedroom,
currently in my living room.


I had to be out of town for two days, so this is where we sit right now. Painter is due back today (Monday) to work some more.

I'll be very glad when this project is done and I can have my LR back.

FOUND!!

This month I've been trying to clean out ds's bedroom, it was a horrific mess (stepped in a rotten apple core recently when trying to find something in there...AND found an open (and full) coke can next to the laptop we bought him for college.. laptop was taken up and I resolved to clean this room, no matter how bitter the complaints).

We've gotten the floor clean, the dresser repaired (there was a broken drawer guide) and now have started to pull stuff down off the closet shelf.

This was in a giant garbage bag on the top shelf. It's a giant bear nap mat. It's made in two pieces with thick quilt batting inbetween.






I made this for my daughter when she must've been about 2 (She's 20 now). I remember making the bear playfully "growl" at her while I was working on it..then after I embroidered the smile on it, she told me "Good, now it can't growl at me anymore". Bless her heart.. I had no idea I was scaring her.

It's in pretty rough shape, having been through two kids and washed in the machine.

I still have the pattern book somewhere.. I remember there was also a bunny rabbit.

And here's the wallpaper that my son wants to be rid of:






I think at 18, he's outgrown it a bit.

We're going for black baseboards and black trim around the doors. The door to the hall, the door to the bathroom and the closet doors will be red. We're going to try to paint over the wallpaper with Dover White (an eggshell color) but if it won't cover, we will paint that one wall red.

There's also astronaut bears border wallpaper around the top of the room. If the dover white won't cover that either, we'll have a red and black stripe around the top.

That's the plan so far anyways...we'll see what happens next.

Laundry

I think I'm going to print this out and tape it to the cabinet over my washer.. for the days that I'm feeling put upon. Aren't things so much better now?

'Washing Clothes Recipe' --
Years ago an Alabama grandmother gave the new bride the following recipe:
This is an exact copy as written and found in an old scrapbook - with spelling
errors and all.
WASHING CLOTHES
Build fire in backyard to heat kettle of rain water. Set tubs so smoke wont blow in eyes if wind is pert. Shave one hole cake of lie soap in boilin water.
Sort things, make 3 piles
1 pile white,
1 pile colored,
1 pile work britches and rags.
To make starch, stir flour in cool water to smooth, then thin down with boiling
water.
Take white things, rub dirty spots on board, scrub hard, and boil, then rub
colored don't boil just wrench and starch.
Take things out of kettle with broom stick handle, then wrench, and starch.
Hang old rags on fence.
Spread tea towels on grass.
Pore wrench water in flower bed. Scrub porch with hot soapy water. Turn tubs upside down.
Go put on clean dress, smooth hair with hair combs. Brew cup of tea, sit and
rock a spell and count your blessings.

Blanket of Roses COMPLETED!!

I started this thing on a whim.. and have finally finished.

In a hurry, so I'll just put the pics up now and will talk about it later.











as always, click the pics to see larger.

It's a pattern no longer in print but can be found online:

Picture:

http://megan.cc/RosesBlanket/

Pattern:

http://megan.cc/RosesBlanket/pattern.html

I used Caron Simply Soft in Rose Violet, Autumn Red as the A colors
Soft Pink as B
Dark Sage as C
Off White as D

For those who don't like Octagons, but do like the Roses; This is ALMOST the same pattern:

http://www.angelfire.com/folk/celtwi...tongarden.html

I've gone through and read the instructions and they are very very similar.

(I thought this blanket was much bigger than it turned out to be.. haha.. going around the edge took at least an hour for each round)

Tragedy at Virginia Tech

My heart and prayers go out to the students, faculty, support staff, family, and friends of all concerned.

It's so hard having a child 1000 miles away at college. Even though they're not at the school affected.. my heart just cries imagining a small portion of what those families must be going through.

Story here, in case you missed it on the news.

A white girls opinion

A white girls opinion probably doesn't count too much in the Don Imus controversy. However, I did run across this essay by a black man (at least I'm assuming he's black by the photo at the top of the webpage), that I think makes a whole lot of sense. If for some reason, you can't view that essay because it's on AOL, here's another good article by the same gentleman.

Until the powers that be start going after the rappers who call women garden impliments and buzzing insects, I think they're operating under a double standard.

Just my opinion.

edit: the original link I put in didn't take people to the correct pages. I've gotten that fixed now.

Triskaidekaphobia

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Triskaidekaphobia


http://mathworld.wolfram.com/Triskaidekaphobia.html

And my Fav.. short & sweet:

http://www.worldwidewords.org/weirdwords/ww-tri1.htm

2 more for Project Linus

Both for Project Linus's support of the TAPS "Good Grief" Camp.

First is the Daisy Square (I call the square FlowerPower..cuz it looks so 60's).. I got tired of all red/white/blue and decided to make the centers different colors. I cut off one square in the bottom right in the picture.. oops...it has a pink center.

Made with Hobby Lobby's "I Love This Yarn". Pattern available from a very generous person on crochetville. Look for Daisy Charity Square or see a previous post for a link to her blog.





Next is another Hearts & Diamonds..made with all Caron yarn. The red & white are the pounder stuff.. the blue is wintuk. This was my first time to use Caron pounders. I don't like it that much and don't think I'll be buying it again. Nothing really wrong with it.. just not what I'm used to working with. I think the wintuk is better quality.

Hearts & Diamonds is a free pattern by Coats & Clark. It used to be a free tear-off in the stores, but now it's available online.





click the pictures to see them larger.

Headline news today had a short story about what the Easter bunny and the cross had to do with one another. They interviewed several people and no one knew that rabbits were a PAGAN symbol. CNN said that Christians adopted the bunny as a symbol of Easter.

THIS IS NEWS TO ME!!! Bunnies have NEVER been a symbol of christianity as far as I know.

Good Grief.

Signs of a Abuser

This was recently posted on Dear Abby, I don't know the original author.

Signs of a abuser (male or female):

1. PUSHES FOR QUICK INVOLVEMENT: Comes on strong, claiming, "I've never felt loved like this by anyone." Pressures the new partner for an exclusive commitment almost immediately.

2. JEALOUS: Excessively possessive; calls constantly or visits unexpectedly. Prevents you from going to work because "you might meet someone"; checks the mileage on your car.

3. CONTROLLING: Interrogates you intensely (especially if you are late) about whom you talked to and where you were; keeps all the money; insists you ask permission to go anywhere or do anything.

4. UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS: Expects you to be the perfect mate and meet his or her every need.

5. ISOLATION: Tries to cut you off from family and friends; accuses people who support you of "causing trouble." May deprive you of a phone or car, or try to prevent you from holding a job.

6. BLAMES OTHERS FOR PROBLEMS OR MISTAKES: It's always someone else's fault if something goes wrong.

7. MAKES OTHERS RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS OR HER FEELINGS: Says, "You make me angry," instead of, "I am angry," or says, "You're hurting me by not doing what I tell you."

8. HYPERSENSITIVITY: Is easily insulted, claiming hurt feelings when he or she is really mad. Rants about the injustice of things that are just part of life.

9. CRUELTY TO ANIMALS OR CHILDREN: Kills or punishes animals brutally. May expect children to do things far beyond their ability (whips a 3-year-old for wetting a diaper) or teases them until they cry. Sixty-five percent of abusers who beat their partner will also abuse children.

10. "PLAYFUL" USE OF FORCE DURING SEX: Enjoys throwing you down or holding you down against your will during sex; finds the idea of rape exciting.

11. VERBAL ABUSE: Constantly criticizes or says blatantly cruel things; degrades, curses, calls you ugly names. This may involve sleep deprivation, waking you with relentless verbal abuse.

12. RIGID GENDER ROLES: Expects you to serve, obey, remain at home.

13. SUDDEN MOOD SWINGS: Switches from sweet to violent in minutes.

14. PAST BATTERING: Admits to hitting a mate in the past, but says the person "made" him (or her) do it.

15. THREATS OF VIOLENCE: Says things like, "I'll break your neck" or "I'll kill you, " then dismisses them with, "Everybody talks that way" or "I didn't really mean it."

And my own rule:

"A man (woman) never looks under the bed unless they have hidden there themselves". If you are being unfairly accused of being unfaithful.. it's not you, it's the accuser.

I'm Just Saying............

Why in the world do people move to a new area.. have a superior attitude, make insulting remarks about that area or population and then wonder why they haven't made any friends since they moved there?

Is it just me or does that make no sense at all?

I'm just saying.........

Another thing that bothers me to no end... since when has the whole world gone broadband? I know I am on the low end of the bell curve having dialup in the US.. but last I heard, most of the world doesn't have fast internet.. just the United States.

I am frequently closing webpages that have oversized pictures (learn to slice or resize your pics folks!!.. if I can learn how..so can you!!)or the sites that have music without a way to turn it off?? ewwww.. instantly closed. Worst of all are the commercial sites that force a flash display on me willy-nilly. If I want to buy shoes, a dress, flowerbulbs, powertools, whatever your widget is.. I don't want to spend 5 minutes waiting for a flash movie to load. grrrr You've very likely lost a customer.. I will move on.

And the folks on eBay who think they attract customers with all the backgrounds and supersized pictures?? for get it. I espescially hate the mouse trails.. I once told a seller that his mouse trails were irritating and kept me from wanting to bid on his item. Idiot cussed me out in email, and blocked me from bidding!! HAHAHAHA.. Idjut did me a huge favor. Can you imagine the trouble I would've had with a seller with that kind of attitude?

And what is it with alot of sellers doing private auctions now? I refuse to bid on those. Way to easy to hide Shill bidding (friends and/or family bidding on the sellers item to drive up the bid) when auctions are private.

I'm just ranting...........

Daisy Square for Charity

Doesn't this look like the old "Flower Power" designs that were ubiquitous in the 70's? This design is courtesy of a talented crocheter from Crochetville.






The one on the upper left still lacks one round.

The square pattern is available free.. with one caveat. The designer requests that upon receipt of the pattern that a square is made and sent to her. She is assembling these into an afghan to be donated to various charities. There's lots more information on the designers blog.

These I'm making will eventually go to Project Linus disguised as a blanket. I'm doing them in Red/White/Blue for the PL drive for the Good Grief Camp/Camp LeJeune during Memorial Day weekend put on by the TAPS Organization (Taps stands for Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors). They will give red, white and blue blankets to the children at the camp to help comfort them.

I 'm using HobbyLobby's "I Love This Yarn" to do the r/w/b.. but I'm going to start doing the centers in various colors (yellow, pink, black, brown, etc.) This will help to break up the colors without ruining the theme.. I hope. If my PL coordinator deems it inappropriate for the taps drive.. well, it can go to a local hospital or shelter.

I rediscovered the audio portion of the wayback machine (or internet archive) while looking for old timey bluegrass for my DS technical theatre class (they're getting ready for UIL competition.. UIL is like district and/or state competitions in other places. Texas does University Interscholastic League.. have to be different .. lol). Anyhow, while searching for Open Source music.. I ran across the audio books on the internet archive. Whoa Nellie!!!

I've downloaded the first 8 or 9 chapters of "Pride and Prejudice" and am listening to them while I type this. I will eventually burn this to CD so I can torture my son during our morning drives to school (he's been dekeyed due to numerous progress reports.. grrrr). I'll have to go and see if there is an audio book version of "The Importance of Being Ernest" which is one of his future assignments in English. (picture me with a wicked grin).

Spring break starts tomorrow too ... good for listening on our day trips too. heheheheheeeee

Found the old song "Wish I were a single girl again" while digging through the open source applachian music last night. This song was also in the movie "Song Catcher" , and it makes me want to see the movie again (great movie for the applachian music, the rest requires a little too much "willing suspension of disbelief"....).

Anyhow, the movie has an old granny midwife singing this song, very effective. The lyrics go:

When I was single, went dressed so fine;
Now I am married, go ragged all the time.

Chorus:
I wish I was a single girl again,
O Lord, don't I wish I was a single girl again!

When I was single, my shoes did screak;
Now I am married, my shoes they do leak.

Three little babies crying for bread,
With none to give them, I'd rather be dead.

Wash them and strip them and put them to bed,
Before your husband curses you and wishes them dead.

Wash their little feet and send them to school,
Along comes a drunkard and calls them a fool.

When I was single, I eat biscuit and pie;
Now I am married it's eat corn-bread or die.

When he comes in, it's a curse and a row,
Knocking down the children and pulling out my hair.

Dishes to wash and spring to go to;
When you are married, you've all to do.

Suppers to get, the cows to milk,
Them blame little children is all crying yet.


Sure makes one think twice, huh?

Randomization

Found this in the tagline of someone's email today:

If you want happiness for an hour—take a nap.
If you want happiness for a day—go fishing.
If you want happiness for a month—get married.
If you want happiness for a year—inherit a fortune.
If you want happiness for a lifetime—help others. -Chinese proverb

I like that.

Flying is getting to be hazardous to a mother's peace of mind. Put DD on the plane today.. we were lucky and got to the terminal early and she got an early flight into Atlanta. But the flight out of Atlanta.. oh dear. She wasn't able to get an earlier flight to her final destination, and her scheduled flight had problems. :( The engine had an oil leak and the pilot didn't want to fly it. So they moved her to another concourse and she's gonna be about an hour later getting in.

I think she's begining to realize why Mom had her fly a day before she absolutely had to be back.

One of the members on crochetville husband was found unresponsive beside his car/truck yesterday. The paramedics were unable to revive him. She's a sahm and has two young daughters. I feel for her.. having lost my dad when I was young.

DS is trying to fail senior english AGAIN. I don't know what to do with the boy. I'm not gonna pay for college for him to screw up like this. He'll have to go out and get a job and support himself if he fails college. Of course, if he doesn't graduate, the university he's interested in isn't going to want him.

Went to the HL after dropping dd at the airport.. nice to shop in a place where they actually have large stores for a change. Found some "I Love This Yarn" yarn... reminds me a lot of Caron Simply Soft. The skeins are 7oz and cost 1.99! The color selection was limited (burgundy, red, navy, royal and white) but I bought 2 red, 2 royal and 3 white.. thinking of doing something for the Taps Project.

We have a new driveway.. it's pretty. no more bumps and holes. we can drive on it.. but can't park on it for another day or so.

Update to Frazzled Friday

Well, here it is Tuesday and I finally feel recovered enough from the weekend to post about it.

But first I want to show some flowers from my yard. My husband and I select for hardiness... if a flower can't survive severe neglect.. it won't fare well with us.















Now, to tell about Delta airlines and my weekend.

My van was finally finished at 5pm friday, and it was only that they had tried to put a non-toyota timing belt on it. Once they got the correct belt on, it was fine. So DH and DS left for their weekend and I stayed home alone (sigh.. lovely to have time alone now and then). DD was scheduled to fly in at 3:44pm on Saturday.. so I got up the next morning and headed for the airport early.

My thinking was that if my van truly acted up again, I'd have time to get it towed somewhere and then get a taxi or rental car to pick her up. And if it didn't give me trouble, I could do some shopping in a larger city (this is a good thing.. right?)

The van worked perfectly. I got to do some shopping (pics of the Joanns shopping haul later) and then went to wait at the airport. Cell phone rings... It's Delta letting me know that the flight has been delayed and it won't be in till 4:07. Oh well, that's not too bad.

It's delayed again, now coming in at 4:25. :( Then there's an announcement.. it's been cancelled! DD and I have been on the cell phone with each other off and on.. and she doesn't know why they're cancelling the flight.. all she knows is that they moved her from one concourse to another.

Finally, she calls and said she's been put on a 8:48 flight.. she should be in about 10:00pm. And Delta did give her a meal voucher so she can eat on their dollar. They tried to put her on an earlier flight, but it got filled up before they got to her.

I went down to the delta ticket desk and asked what was going on. The very nice man behind the counter told me that a flight before hers had a crew not show up (Probably due to bad weather elsewhere) and then her flight had a mechanical problem. So Delta was faced with trying to fit passengers from two earlier flights onto later flights.

This was about 4pm that we finally found out she would be coming in at 10. I left the airport, went and had a awful supper at Cracker Barrel.. bleah.. the potatoes were cold and tasteless...I complained to the waitress and she didn't care. so phooey on her... she lost the tip I would've normally left.

Then I went and got a hotel room, I don't like to drive after dark unless I have to, and with the van having been persnickety and with husband out of town, decided it was better to sleep there than to drive home. I took a 2 hour nap and then went and picked up DD.

The rest of the night was uneventful. We had a good breakfast the next morning and then came on home.

When I got home and checked my email.. I had 7 notices from Delta about the flight changes/glitches!! Amazing.

DS and DH had a great time at the senior weekend. Nothing very exciting happened to them that I know of.

Frazzled Friday

Letter to my sister (names and places have been concealed for an attempt at privacy)

Thanks so much Sis (and DBIL and DN) for being willing to do this for us.

Last time I checked (no time to check this morning) they weren't assigning seats on the first flight, infact, the flight looked overbooked. So DD will need to be there more than an hour ahead of time to make sure that she gets a seat. And please make sure that she has her Travelers Checks.

I'm running a bit frazzled this morning. Had my van in the shop earlier this week, just to get it serviced..routine maintenance. Picked it up yesterday and about the time I got in the driveway the check engine light came on.

So I have to take the van back in again this morning. Now, here's where the stress comes in. DH and DS have a trip planned this weekend for Senior Weekend & so DH/Dad can visit the campus and so that DS can attempt to test out of some freshman classes.

If the van can't be ready enough to make a trip to the airport (about 90 miles one way).. I might have to go with the boys tonight and then drive up Saturday afternoon to pick up DD. I'm frantically doing laundry while this is being typed and checking the hotel to see if they will take small animals... in case our vet can't keep Madchen on short notice. This realization came to me at 2:30 am.. and I've been doing laundry since as once I take the van to the shop, I may be stuck there for several hours with no ride home.

It will all work out.. The two towns are only about an hour apart...but I tend to worry when things don't go according to plan. It's all in Gods hands I know.. but it does help to prepare!!

Thanks again for being such a helpful sister.

Progress Report

Got some more octagons completed and sewn together.. thought I'd show how it's growing.







I also discovered that the Charleston Garden pattern is almost the same as this one. It makes squares instead of Octagons.. so as my Partner in Crime over at CALPALS said.. this solves the problem of how to make a square pillow out of an Octagon.

Magnolia Square, not a Waterlily

The square was found.. thanks to some smart folks from CrochetPartners.

The pattern is at Crochet Musings If that link doesn't work, try this one.

Here's my version of it.




I think it might look better done in a yarn with more "body" to it (stiffer). I made this out of caron simply soft in soft pink, off white and dark sage.

Many thanks to all who searched for the pattern.

WaterLily Square

I actually don't know the name of this square, but it does look like a WaterLily to me.






Someone showed the picture on Crochetville, and since then I've been searching for a pattern. No luck so far, but the search has been fun.

I think I can noodle out the pattern for the petals (the middle ones look like a sc, dc, tr, dc, sc shell, not so sure about the outer petals) and the green square shouldn't be to hard to approximate.

It's the pink ball in the center that I'm not sure about. And wouldn't it need to be stuffed with something to keep it from flattening out?

P.S. Could it also be a Lotus Blossom?

Walmart dissing Sewers/Crafters?

Good article here about Walmarts decision to close it's fabrics/crafts areas and what we can do about it.


sewing.about.com/b/a/256500.htm

P.S. The online petition is probably worthless. I suggest snailmail for best effect.

Another Hearts & Diamond throw

I'll probably give this to ProjectLinus for a teen, unless some other good use comes up for it. A little too femine for my ds and dd has enough blankets at the moment. And I did this pattern for all 4 sisters & sis in law a while back.

Did this to bust stash. Using 4 skeins of Red Heart kids in color Jade (sure looks turquoise to me) and 3 skeins of RH super saver Amethyst. Had to buy 1 skein of RH Turqua to finish out the heart sections (couldnt' find RH Kids).. I was short only 1 oz!! GRRRrrrr

One of my favorite quick (and free) patterns. Thinking of doing one in RWB for ProjectLinus for their memorial day drive.

Spyware sends Teacher to Jail

I recently learned about the case of Julie Amero, the subsitute teacher in Connecticut who is possibly facing 40 years (yes.. 4 0 ...) for having pornographic popups come up on a computer while in a classroom.

She's a SUBSTITUE.. the computer wasn't hers. The regular teacher isn't being questioned. There wasn't current blocking software being used.. The IT director isn't being questioned.

This is a travesty of justice, another case of zero-tolerance gone wrong.

I could reiterate the entire case, but so many others have said it better than me, so I will just give some links to some well thought out blogs and news articles on this.

http://www.geeknewscentral.com/archives/006784.html

http://www.courant.com/news/local/hc-rgreen0130.artjan30,0,4371427.column?coll=hc-utility-local

http://www.pbs.org/teachersource/learning.now/2007/02/more_details_emerge_in_the_jul.html

http://www.alternet.org/rights/46925/ (~~some comments on this site have profanity..)

http://sunbeltblog.blogspot.com/2007/01/computerworld-julie-amero-is-guilty.html

http://www.norwichbulletin.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070124/NEWS01/701240317

http://preview.tinyurl.com/255wq2 (~~ new york times article)

http://windowssecrets.com/comp/070222/ (~~ need to scroll down to "popups" article)

http://www.securityfocus.com/columnists/434 (~~excellent, but very long at 7 pages)

http://julieamer.blogspot.com/ (~~ blog by Julie's husband)

Mesonychoteuthis hamiltoni

Can you transmit flu over the web?

Monday I was reading my friend Y2KSurvivors Blog about him not having PeterPanSalmonella and then his kids come down with the flu.. and he loses his couch and tv priviledges to the princess. I was feeling a little sorry for him, but not terribly.

Karma has visited my household for my uncaring. My ds now has the flubug. I have not lost my easy chair (yet) but have lost control of the TV. Next year I WILL get my flu shot.

Still trying to figure out how the flu jumped from OK to TX so fast. His kids were sick Monday.. mine started feeling bad Monday afternoon.

More weirdness....

After posting about my squid purse yesterday.. today I scan the news.. and a fisherman off New Zealand somehow captured a Colossal Squid. A Colossal Squid is BIGGER than a giant squid. According to the news articles I read, a Giant Squid is just like our friends that we turn into Calamari, only bigger. Colossals are different.. they're shorter and stockier.

They said that they think the Colossal that they found is a male, but that it's difficult to sex a squid (!!! Now that is a job I do not want !!!). As large as this male (?) squid is.. they say females of these species tend to be larger. Wow.

One article talked about making Calamari out of the Colossal. "I can assure you that this is going to draw phenomenal interest. It is truly amazing," added Dr. O`Shea, “if calamari rings were made from the squid they would be the size of tractor tires”.

I have to remember to send the article to my dd. hahahha evil me.

I'm frightened.. if I crochet and post another animal.. what will be the repercussions?

I shall test and see if I hold such powers over the plant world....

Here's my latest work in progress:








I'm using simply soft in autumn red, soft pink, rose violet, dark sage and off white. Rubine red would probably have been better.. but i'm using what is locally easy for me to find. Making this for fun..

It's an old pattern, and the yarn recommended is no longer made, but the Caron is working up just fine.

Ok, now if I read about a Colossal Rose bush found, or maybe a bunch of people crocheting an Afghanus Giganticus.. I'll be more than frightened.. I'll start trying to figure out how to use my powers to make the world a better place. (Put a little love in your heart...oh no.. I'm gonna have that song stuck in my head. Well, it's better than "Lonesome Polecat" from 7B47B "A man can't sleep, when he sleeps with sheep")

Calamari

Man, I love seafood. Shrimp, Fish, Oysters, Clams, Scallops, Crabs. I even like Calamari (I'm getting hungry typing this post).

After posting about the fish post (and getting a comment from Lady Linoleum!! wow.. she's my hero, I can't believe I got a comment from her.. I'm so not worthy) I remembered about the Squid Purse I made a couple of years ago to torment DD.

(as always, both pics clickable to see larger)





front



back



There's a story behind this. Sometime before I made the above, my son and husband were snacking on some calamari. My daughter comes walking in the kitchen and says.."oh.. Onion Rings.. may I have some?" My husband and son both being of devilish nature, did NOT tell her what she was eating until all 3 had finished the snack. Daughter dear still has not forgiven the boys for playing this trick on her. She's not allergic to seafood or anything.. just doesn't like the idea of eating squid.

So when I found the pattern over at C'ville, I had to make it for her. I should add eyes (not blood shot ones ala LL, but googly) right now the poor thing is sight impaired. This baby is mine. Not going anywhere (except maybe out on the town with me) and of course, dd doesn't like it.

I forgot to add anything to show how big it is.. but a candybar sized cell phone would fit with plenty of room for some other odds and end.

Fish Food

Ya'll might remember me posting about a fish purse not too long ago.






I was planning on sending it to my great-niece via my sister. Well, I did send it last Monday and finally remembered to email my sister about it today to see if it arrived and if K liked it.

Here's her reply:

Well, I didn’t even show it to her. I liked it too much to show it to her!!!!! I figured I could use it a few times before I let her use it. She has so many pretty things, princess stuff……..dresses with veils and scarfs, purses, jewelry, shoes, ribbons for her hair……………..

I couldn’t help it! Too cute!! Maybe I’ll let her have it next year! I know I’m a terrible “granny” but ………it’s just too cute to pass up.

I’ll probably break down and offer it to her in a few weeks…………

For K*** and myself, thank you for the fish purse. Just too cute…you should do one in Nemo colors.

They say having kids around keeps a person young at heart…………it may be true.


P.S. I even tried it on as a hat! It’s cute that way too.

I thought her comments were very funny (and flattering) and wanted to share with ya'll. I wish I had a picture of the fish hat. I'll ask her for one and post it if she will allow.

Pink Camoflauge

Where does one wear pink camo to hide? Maybe the beach in Hawaii with all the impatients that bloom there?

Anyways.. Bernat makes this camoflauge yarn..and one of the variations available is Pink. It's really pretty (and durn hard to find.. it sells out as soon as stores get it in).

I managed to find 1 skein at a local store, and then as I was walking down an aisle with totally different stuff on it, non-yarn related.. I found a 2nd skein. Yahoo for lazy folks (Too lazy to take 12 steps to put it back where it belonged..so I found it) !!

I made DD in college a scarf out of it for Valentines. Mailed it last monday (the 12th) but she didn't check her postal box till the 16th (turkey). She says it's been really cold so the scarf was most welcome. She liked the chocolates too!

Here's a picture:




clickable

There's not really a pattern, but I could write it up if there's enough of a demand. In reality it's just the Crosshatch Stitch done lengthwise. Clover Softtouch Hook, size G, slightly more than 1 skein used.

After lots of compliments and questions, I decided to try to write the pattern. And I made another blog for patterns, as I have a couple more I need to get out of my head and onto paper.